Wednesday, September 14, 2016


We started preschool last week. I am claiming the first person plural of the experience because prepping for preschool is no small feat. I was knee-deep in nap mats, special water bottles, and shoe stickers last Monday in anxious expectation of handing my baby over to strangers for fifteen hours a week.
Thankfully, the little lady seems to love her teachers and the whole school experience. It is exhausting, and her one-hour naps on the floor do not a well-rested toddler make, but overall, we are liking the whole preschool experience.
For my own happy recollections, I'd like to indulge my sentimental side and record a few pertinent facts about my beautiful two-year-old and her preschool journey:
  • She loves The Beatles, which is totally my fault, but we now have to listen to "I Love You" (She Loves Me) and "Yellow Sub-narine" (Yellow Submarine) on repeat when driving anywhere. Especially on the 20-minute ride to and from her school three days a week. Occasionally she will mix it up by cooning, "All the Lonely People," which makes me look like a stellar parent.
  • Each night when she picks out her outfit for the next day, she tells me that she needs to wear such-and-such because it's her favorite. The child has a lot of favorites. 
  • She has also learned how to scream while at school, presumably from the other children. Ok, she already knew how, but the frequency has increased greatly in the last week. On the car ride home after her first day, she randomly shouted out, "Sit down, Jackson." And when prompted, explained that was what she had learned at school. Apparently socialization at the preschool level involves a lot of loud exclamations.
  • She is very proud that she gets to go to her own school, just like Daddy goes to his every day.
  • Little lady is very into apologizing. She informs other children that they need to apologize when she feels wronged and often says "I'm sorry 'bout that." for unknown offenses. She also likes to sassily tell her parents that we don't have to "pologize at her." Thanks, sweetheart.
  • She has started calling me "sweetie" but only allows me to call her by her first name and middle initial. She's adamant that she be called by this combination or she will not respond.
Maybe now that I have some time to collect my thoughts sans a little person I will start writing on here more. In the meantime, here's my little lady in her "butterfly dress." Naturally, it's her favorite.

Sunday, March 6, 2016

Inherited Traits

My kid inherited my overactive gag reflex. I have caught vomit in my hands 3 times in the past week. These facts are definitely related.
We tease my dad that my sister and I inherited his sense of humor (thanks, Dad!) and his sweat glands (no thanks). We overheat easily, always have pit stains, and are asked after mild physical exertion if we have a third degree sunburn. Yes, heat is not my friend. It makes me look like a lobster and exude lots of sweat. 
But, I digress. Back to the little miss who I fear will someday write a blog post, or whatever form of self-expression they use when she's grown, about how her mother cursed her with an oversensitive gag reflex. After twenty-some-odd years of dealing with this malady, I am good at not throwing up. Gagging is inevitable, but up-chucking is a choice. Not so much for my toddler.
I'm trying to handle the situation with levity, but without knowing exactly what is causing her to gag, it's getting pretty serious. She loves milk, and I am terrified to give it to her. We are running out of clean clothes and baking soda to clean up the stains. Someone please send Pedialyte, stat.
Just kidding. Kind of. Here's to hoping there's a lot less throw up in all of our futures.

Tuesday, January 26, 2016

Things my Kid Says

Preface: I prayed while pregnant for a smart little girl, and I have been blessed with one whose verbal aptitude delights and challenges me every day. She speaks in fairly grammatically correct sentences, "reads" parts of her favorite books, and can repeat any new word she hears. She can also use words to be obstinate, (innocently) manipulative, and easily frustrated. In other words, no matter how smart she is, she's a toddler.

The other morning when I went to get her from her crib, she told me "Momma always comes back" which I have said before to comfort her and is a surefire way to make me feel guilty for not running to her at her first cry. Well played, small child.

Almost every morning, she asks for "mulk," which used to be pronounced "bilk," so we're moving in the right direction. Sometimes she gets "chockit mulk," but she asks for it at least three times for every one time she actually receives that treat. She often tells me she "needs" things, and I have on occasion tried to explain to her that not all of her wants are actually needed. Yes, I am the mom trying to debate abstract concepts with a less-than-two-year-old. 

She has also started reporting frequently after nap time that she has dreams. It goes something like this:
Little Lady: I had a nice dream.
Me: What was it about?
LL: Jesus
Me: What about Jesus?
LL: He's a baby.
Me: What did he do?
LL: He's ok.

So...I'm probably in line for Christian parent of the year because my kid still thinks Jesus is a baby in spite of the fact we just celebrated Easter. But she knows about Him, so I'm feeling pretty ok. :)

In other Easter news, the little lady LOVES the Easter Bunny and asks to see him frequently. She recounts how she gave him "a hug" and "I gived him a high five!" 

She can say her whole name and age "twenty-one months," but frequently gives the answer to the other question when asked. For example, "what's your whole name?" is answered "twenty-one months."

There you have it. A random collection of funny things my kid says.