Create vs. Maintain

I am a stay-at-home-mom. This is both the best of jobs and the worst of jobs, in my opinion. Because it isn't really a job so much as it is a lifestyle or an unpaid labor situation. I was the girl in high school who unabashedly declared my intention to be a SAHM, to the jeers of my fellow students. This has been my dream for so long that it's seeped its way into my psyche. And yet...
There's a lot of maintenance that goes along with taking care of children and a home day in and day out. (And night in and night out, but I digress.) At least for me, there is very little creativity involved with keeping children fed, semi-clean, and clothed. Lots of love and patience, but very little creativity. I believe in a divine Creator who knit me together and gave me the privilege of participating in the divine creation of my children. But now that they are topside, they require a whole lot of maintenance. The baby needs to be held, and have diapers changed, encouraged to sleep (endlessly, it seems), and fed (solids and breastmilk). The three-and-a-half-year-old needs to be fed and clothed and feel like she is heard. And the child loves to talk as much as I love to write. She needs to be played with and read to, and then there's all the chores required to keep the house running and decently clean. Dishes and laundry and vacuuming, oh my!
All of which leaves precious little time to think, much less create anything. And I yearn to create. Words are my typical medium, but I've been dabbling lately with watercolors because I can sometimes "mother" and paint at the same time, if the little lady is willing to create her own masterpieces at the table with me. So here I am, stringing together a few words during nap time, and trying to carve out a space for the creativity within. So many of my linguistic compositions never go anywhere beyond my mind, and in the fog of sleep-deprivation and the unbearably long list of tasks that need doing, I all too often allow creating to fall victim to the demands of maintaining. If you buy into Maslow's Hierarchy, I submit that taking care of small children forces you to camp out on the bottom two levels, which is painfully annoying.
Lest you worry, I am not going to let my children run around naked or go hungry, but I am recommitting to find ways to squeeze in moments of creative expression throughout my days.
Maybe that means I'll be composing more blog posts, or maybe it will take another form. But since I believe in a Creative, loving God who cares more about my kids than even I am capable of and who counts me as one of His children, I also believe that He cares about my desire to create. And in the midst of the holy mess of motherhood and maintenance, I think God cares enough to grant me time to continue participating in the divine gift of creation.